1. Pure Obsession (Finn) – Chapter Four


    Date: 3/2/2017, Categories: Reluctance, Author: SITTING, Rating: 21, Source: LushStories

    feelings.” She didn’t laugh. She watched me anxiously. “I haven’t been with many guys, you know,” she said unexpectedly. “I mean, there was this friend of my dad’s. I was like… eighteen. And then Daniel. And now you.” “So?” “All of them have been mistakes.” I looked at her, trying to figure out what she was telling me. “You think I’m a mistake?” I asked quietly. “I don’t know yet.” She let go of my hand and scooped her hair up into a ponytail.” I’ve been pretty confused for the last couple of months. I like you, don’t get me wrong, but I have this… obligation to Daniel. Shouldn’t I put in the effort to save what we have?” “If you want to do that, you’ll have to be clean with him,” I said patiently. “And ask him what he’s done. You can’t build anything on lies.” Hypocrite. “Do what makes you happy,” I continued. “I know it’s obvious but half the time we get so worked up over other people we forget about ourselves. Think about it. Can you honestly see yourself spending the rest of your life with Daniel? Does the thought make you happy?” “I don’t like thinking about the future,” she said softly. “There are too many possibilities. I just want to take things one day at a time.” “I’ll take that as a no,” I said drily. She looked at me. “You would. You hate him.” “Hate’s a strong word,” I frowned. “But I think you’re worth more. Why should you have to care about him?” “Because deep down he’s not a bad guy,” she said in that earnest voice. “I know that. I mean, we all make mistakes. ...
    Every time I screw up, I have to deal with it myself and it’s horrible. I don’t want him to feel like he’s alone. Someone has to be there for him. His family live on the other side of the world. His so-called friends are only there for the good times. I can’t abandon him. It’s not right.” I listened to her words and they made no sense. I could feel myself getting vaguely angry and I knew I had to keep a level tone. “Why do you care?” I asked quietly. “What does he give you in return? Caring about someone shouldn’t just be a one way thing. The way you’re talking, it sounds like you’d stand by him even if he started doing drugs again.” She didn’t look me in the eye. Her gaze hovered uncertainly on my mouth and she shrugged a little limply. “I guess I would.” I felt sick, stunned, almost like I’d been punched in the stomach. I opened my mouth to reply, to say something sensible that would change her mind and yet the words weren’t there. There was nothing more to say. We sat there watching each other and there was nothing left between us. Just a gaping, black hole of emptiness. “I’d better go,” I said finally, trying to keep my voice steady. “It’s been a long day.” She said words to protest, meaningless words that were dwarfed into insignificance and I didn’t hear any of them. I ignored her and walked out of the door, forcing myself not to slam it behind me. Outside it was windy and raining hard. I was soaked through even before I’d reached the end of her road. The streetlights ...
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