1. A favour for Misty pt1


    Date: 4/5/2016, Categories: Sex Humor, Author: alibodge, Rating: 100, Source: xHamster

    wants something and needs to butter me up first. The meal went down a treat, steak casserole mash carrots and dumplings, washed down with a beer followed by the finest apple pie and ice cream, then coffee. Knowing something was afoot; I did as all husbands do, enjoyed the meal and avoided subjects that I thought might be the one she wanted to get into, feeling like a man wearing hobnails and tiptoeing through a minefield I could not see the killer stroke coming so the conversation went something like this; “What would you think I would do if you dropped dead this instant?” [That threw me a little, Off-beat, or what! ] “Erm... dunno love!” [Good keep it conversational...] Were you thinking of bumping me off? ” I said eyeing the remains of the pie suspiciously”why do you ask? Smiling, She Quickly said “no,” but then went on to explain the predicament of our neighbour, and her best friend Misty, had ‘gotten to her’ “Oh?” [Non committal, let her do the talking it`s safer] She rambled on about how she would miss me and that sort of old twaddle, then said she knew I was still a sexual b**st and that she knew she was not much of a partner for me, etc [by now I was panicking expecting her to mention last night’s coupling, but no, she rambled on about how she would have expected me to have strayed by now! [In every portion of my brain alarm bells were ringing] I strongly affirmed that I had not done anything of the sort and that i never would!...[wrong answer...of all the answers in ...
    this world I could have picked this surprisingly was the worse in the whole range] “Oh!” she said “that is a shame and I was hoping you may have wanted to stray!” [No lost again “no speaky lady talk! I don’t understand her convoluted female thoughts] Like a plonker I asked what she just said had I heard her right and would she like to explain? “Well!” she said “It`s a bit difficult, I sort of offered your sexual services to Misty in fact gave my word last night... Mouth now open, staring eyes bulging, mind in overtime, I had just talked myself out of a ‘wife legal’ screw! [Woops, Quick!, back-paddle make her the guilty one !] “Your word, what rights have you got to farm me out like some stud horse, I know your my wife but how would you feel if I offered you out like that?” [Mock irritation, make her feel guilty!] She said she was sorry she didn’t think I would have minded, it was just the drink and feeling sorry for her friend, she would go and tell misty that i didn’t fancy her... [bl**dy hell, quick what to do? Think] “you will look a right dummy if you do,” I declared, then added with a deep sigh “oh go on then I will but only to help you out... “Would you really do that just for me,” she asked with a twinkle in her eye, “Oh thank you, thank you, thank you,” she said as got up and went off to her bed tossing the comment over her shoulder that I was to be “over the road at 7 sharp on Saturday evening, [Game set and match to me I think, but why do I have a vague feeling of ...
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