1. The Chain: Link 7


    Date: 2/20/2016, Categories: Fantasy & Sci-Fi, Author: PervyStoryteller, Rating: 2, Source: LushStories

    Professor Evans stood at his window, looking down on the students milling about below. It was shocking the way young girls dressed these days. Well, they were young women, he supposed, at least in law, but he could never think of anyone under 25 as a proper adult, certainly not given the way they behaved. There was one now, with cut-off jeans transformed into something so short he could just about make out the southernmost coastline of her buttocks. Disgraceful. There were far too many of them like that. Even some of the girls who went in for gender studies. They took the liberty of declaring that they were entitled to dress as they pleased, but if you so much as glanced at them they shot you a dirty look back. What did they expect, when they dressed so provocatively? He turned. The whole world was going mad; sex mad. On his desk was a padded brown envelope bearing witness to that. It had been sent to him at the university, delivered that lunch time; containing a small, plaster figurine of two lovers entwined, with an accompanying letter. Well, more of a note really. He placed the figurine to one side and the note in front of him. Then he tapped in digits on the phone, putting the thing on speaker. That was another thing about the modern world. He really shouldn’t have to wait so long to be put through to the relevant officer. He watched as the hand on the clock on his wall shifted a full six minutes. Then a voice finally said, “PC Whippy speaking. How can I help you?” It ...
    was a female voice. Dimly Professor Evans thought the name chimed well with his own ideas about how to treat miscreants, but he was too irate for the idea to hang around. “This is Professor Evans,” he said, as if the woman should know instantly who he was. “I’ve received an odd parcel through the post. I want something done about it.” “Very good, sir,” PC Whippy said. “When you say odd, do you mean suspicious?” “Suspicious?” Professor Evans said. “Odd, suspicious; what’s the difference?” “Well, sir, under subsection 47 of the Unsolicited Mail Act…” Professor Evans clicked his tongue impatiently. “Are you interested in my complaint, Constable?” The woman took a deep breath. “Have you any reason to suspect that the contents are of an explosive nature?” “What? No, no,” Professor Evans said, but he eyed the figurine suspiciously, as if there might be a tiny consignment of Semtex inside. “Well that’s alright then. Saves us calling out the Bomb Squad, eh?” Professor Evans felt his exasperation grow. Were the police populated by morons now on top of everything else? “Constable…” he said, trying to keep his anger in check. “Could you please describe the parcel for me, sir?” PC Whippy said calmly. That was more like it. “Well, it’s not so much a parcel as a padded envelope,” Professor Evans said. “It contained a small plaster figure and an accompanying note. I suppose it’s, er, the note that is the offensive item.” “I see, sir. Would you care to enlighten me as to the wording of the ...
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